Beautiful Between

living fully in the now & not yet

A Letter to My Twenty-Year-Old Self

I almost didn’t let you see this. It was just a simple exercise that appeared in my inbox from Ally Fallon. It was remarkably healing, but I thought it might be just for me. 

Then I shared it with a room of young women who have walked similar roads. I was so humbled to see it open a space for them to speak kindly to their younger selves.

There were hushed sobs as they realized the shame and anger they hold for themselves, weights lifted as they learned how compassion for themselves sounds. It was cathartic and difficult, but a sacred moment. 

Friends, I want the same for you. You can click here to read my letter on Steve’s site. But once you do, can I invite you to write your own letter? Here is the only rule: be kind to yourself. Release judgement and shame. Speak as though you’re writing to a beloved younger sibling or child. You’ll be surprised what compassion does for your heart.

Nobody needs to see if you don’t want to share. But if you do, we would be honored to hear it in Steve’s private Grace Is Messy Facebook group. You can also send it to me at or post advice for your younger self in the comments here. No matter what, I’d love to read your words and hear how you’ve grown. Your story is important, friend, and you are worth the kindness.

2 Replies

  1. Carol Horton

    I read your letter; what a beautiful, compassionate gift to yourself. I believe this could be expanded to become a book to help people heal from trauma (or am I too late?). When I see people I love going through a rough time, I try to think of a book that could help them through it. The beauty in this is that they can go through it as fast or slow as they want, or not at all and discover it again later when they might be more receptive to it. There are several people I know right now who could benefit from a book like that.

    1. Thank you so much for your kind words, Carol. I’d love to write a book to help people heal at some point-it’s so encouraging to hear that you think this could help others. And how thoughtful to find books for your friends going through tough times ????

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